That was then; this is now. This is how our passage begins. “From now on…” In other words, something happened, and it changed everything. There was a before, and there was an after.
Our lives as human beings are filled with befores and afters. Before and after we learned to drive. Before and after we met the person we decided was “the one.” Before and after the diagnosis. Sometimes, the befores were better; sometimes the afters were better! How many of these befores and afters truly marked our souls? How many of them were painful? Or joyful? How many of them resulted in a kind of wisdom for which, now, we are grateful?
Both joy and suffering can be our teachers, though I think we tend to assume difficulties will impart more wisdom than our successes. Our parents told us that, that the tough parts of life would give us character. My mother liked to quote Nietzsche, “That which doesn’t kill me makes me strong.” Pain and sorrow can give us wisdom. They can give us a new view on life. Marshall McLuhan said, “I don’t know who discovered water, but I know it wasn’t a fish.” Rabbi Steve Leder explained it this way:
Because a fish is born in water, lives in water, dies in water… ironically, the fish is the idiot that doesn't know it's in water…Look, we are like that fish and…when does a fish discover water? When it's jerked out of it, wriggling at the end of a hook, gasping for breath. That's when a fish discovers water, and it is only pain and disruption that can do that for us…Disruption is the only thing that teaches us anything. It can provide us with some of the deepest wisdom of our lives.
Image: Copyright Kate Bowler, 2025.
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